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Joke of the Day
"Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook."
Next Joke
"A farmer was worried when he counted only 196 cows... ...but when he rounded them up, much to his relief, he had 200."
"My French buddy keeps trying to get me to drink It's a lot of Pierre pressure"
"Did you hear about the cannibal who was late to dinner? Yeah, he got the cold shoulder."
"If you need a distraction from the election there is a new American reality TV series starting soon. It's called The White House. Apparently the lead actor has been given a 4 season contract."
"To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office... ..I will find you. You have my Word. --- Edit: 1000 upvotes. Of course it would be on a self post. :( Thanks though. <3"
"How do you stop a dog howling in the back of a car? Put him in the front."
"What I say to someone who's being crabby: Clam down, I'm shore it'll be fine."
"dave chappelle as a BLACK WHITE SUPREMACIST http://www.shortform.com/chocolatethunder/weheartcomedy/dave-chappelle-black-white-supremacist"
"What did the sushi say to the bee? WASABI"