91783

Joke of the Day

"- grabs leash - grabs phone - takes dog out for walk - pulls out phone - checks Twitter - walks dog to South America"

"What are some pros of living in Switzerland? Well the flag is a big plus"

"What do you call a sheep tied to a lamp post in New Zealand? A community centre"

"Arnold Schwarzenegger and Michael Jackson decided to combine their efforts to create a Superhuman... they called it Michael Sch......was-a-negger. Sorry for the Racism :<"

"So I studied abroad in college... She never called me back though."

"Why Did The Hedgehog Cross The Road? Because he wanted to see his flat mate."

"A beautiful woman approaches a man in a bar... A beautiful woman approaches a man in a bar and says, ""hey, big boy. You single?"" He says, ""yeah! How'd you know?"" ""You're fucking ugly, for starters."""

"Just met Darth Vader's corrupt brother. Taxi Vader"

"What's it called when two female scientists have sex for the first time? A double slit experiment"

"Vodka mixes well with everything, except decisions."