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Joke of the Day
"So I studied abroad in college... She never called me back though."
Next Joke
"Man crushed by giant baseball. Witnesses say object came right out of left field."
"A different Roman walks into a bar... Hey cousin, want to go bowling?"
"A wannabee client asked me to find her a one bedroom apartment in Manhattan for $900/month. ...then she added ""Oh, I have a 60 pound dog, too."" I politely replied: ""I don't have a time machine."""
"The doctor gave me 2 months to live I'll spend them making people think I'm reposting."
"Coke is just cherry coke after it's lost its virginity."
"Try this for fun: Go to a parking lot and put sticky notes on people's cars saying ""Sorry for the damage."" Watching them is priceless."
"How do you turn soup into gold? You add 24 carats!"
"That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, hit a lamp, and kill your mum."
"I slipped and fell outside today... and when I got up, my wallet and keys were missing. Must've been black ice."