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Joke of the Day

"Idiot White Supremacist Why did the idiot white supremacist burn a cross on the wife-beater's lawn? He heard the abuser's wife had two black guys at once"

"{Stalker Diary} I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night."

"HOW TO JOG: 1. Put on jogging outfit. 2. Go outside. 3. Imagine a cow galloping down the street. 4. Try to milk that cow."

"Why can't the bicycle stand on its own ? Because its two tyred"

"Picture someone robbing you. Congratulations, you're a fucking racist."

"I'm usually pretty inspired after watching a movie to try something I've just seen. [hunts for a movie about cleaning bathrooms]"

"A man with multiple-personality disorder walked into a bar. No he didn't."

"Don't be afraid to put yourself out there. The worst that can happen is embarrassment, social shame and everyone thinking you're an idiot"

"Why are sergeants so successful in physical contests? Three stripes, you rout."

"Sex is not the answer... Sex is the question. ""Yes"" is the answer"