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Joke of the Day

"What did the two vaginas say to the butthole? ""Don't hate us if you anus."""

"Yo you guys ever try hanging out with people you like who also like you? Shit's dank af"

"I had a parrot. The parrot talked, but it did not say ""I'm hungry,"" so it died."

"I could live comfortably for the rest of my life on the advertising budget of an insurance company on any given weekend in the fall."

"Barista: I have a latte for *3 second long screeching noise* Velociraptor: Actually it's *4 second long screeching noise* but close enough"

"Did you hear about that proctologist who became an English teacher? Did you hear about the proctologist who became and English teacher? He specializes in teaching analogies."

"I like my women like I like my bikes. Chained up and locked down in my garage."

"What do robots dip in salsa? Microchips"

"Butt sex is a lot like spinach If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult."

"When I hear the word ""aftermath"" - it always makes me hungry. At school, lunch period followed Math class, so we ate ""aftermath"""