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Joke of the Day

"Amazing statistic. The new U2 album is the most deleted record in history."

"Whenever I Get in Trouble My Back Hurts I guess I have scold-iosis"

"4yo has repeated one word for an hour. 6yo is ninja fighting his imaginary friend. My move to a mental asylum will be an easy transition."

"Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they're gonna pay. You have my Word."

"What di you call a snowman in may? A puddle!"

"The American stock market is a bear BULL shit"

"A flat earth conspiracist was boasting about how many people believe that the Earth is flat... He said, ""We have supporters all around the globe!!!"""

"It's amazing how much more money I have when I'm drunk."

"[emergency] [super hero appears] GUY: It's Doesn't-Understand-Rhetorical-Questions Man. Boy, am I glad to see you! HERO: I...I don't know"

"An unfortunate blind date. that's the last blind date I go on. She turned up. hit me with her cane then her dog bit me. It was like she couldn't even see."