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Joke of the Day

"I bet M. Night Shyamalan was really good the first time he had sex, then terrible every time after."

"How many dead hookers does it take to fill up a garage I know it isn't 37"

"Why didn't the elephant eat the banana?"

"I prefer Protestant orange juice to Catholic orange juice... It's Pulp-free"

"When do you stop at green, and go at red? when eating watermelon"

"My partner left me because of my pasta feeling fetish I'm feeling cannelloni right now..."

"Why doesn't Hitler like Jewish wivern's? Because they're a dragon the state"

"What's in Pandora's box? A fine case of herpes."

"I got a fitbit to get a sense for my activity level After a few days of wearing it, it asked if I was a tree"

"I'm sorry to hear your uncle was run over by a boat in Venice. My gondolences."