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Joke of the Day

"I used to Remember Leonardo DiCaprio When I was feeling down. Unfortunately I still remember him."

"Gary Johnson Has won the election."

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: No idee-er. (idea) Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no idee-er."

"If I could time-travel, forget killing baby Hitler. I'd go back to use every come back I ever thought of 10 minutes too late."

"Why did Princess Leia spit and not swallow? Because it was Chewy"

"When life gives you lemons, you should peel one in front of the other lemons. You know... to send a message."

"They developed a new type of cough syrup for Elephants with bad tusks. They call it, Robituskin'."

"What is a Coronal Mass Ejection? I might be wrong here, but I think it's when you throw up after drinking too much Mexican beer."

"What did the ghost serve at his Halloween party? Hallowieners!"

"Where do twin lesbians meet up? A Clone Dyke Bar."