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Joke of the Day
"Worst place to buy condoms? A church. They're holy."
Next Joke
"Mother: My goodness, Jerry, who gave you that black eye? Jerry: No one gave it to me. I had to fight for it!"
"Like a flat tire.......how I'm rolling this morning."
"I would like to be a zombie because when someone asked me if I had a boyfriend I could just eat them."
"What's the difference between a stoner and a Jew? A stoner gets baked on purpose"
"Q: How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list."
"*takes a picture of mother nature* MOTHER NATURE: delete it"
"The only way to score with a robot Is to get it in the mode"
"Treat your woman like a princess. Spice up your relationship & have her kidnapped. Then do mushrooms & swim through the sewers to find her."
"me: maybe those nazi salutes... we're just them reaching for the stars... McDonald's manager: this is the fastest I've ever fired someone"