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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between New York City and the deep south? In the deep south they at least had a show trial before letting murders walk free."

"They say you're only as old as you feel. Yet they'll arrest you for trying to feel a 12 year-old."

"What do you call a disabled Lego? An O."

"S&M My wife and I are into S&M. She goes to Sleep, I Masturbate."

"Knock, knock. Who's there?"

"*Spends 30 min practicing Starbucks order in mirror* *Feels confident* *""Hi I'd like a grander ahoy Ralph Macchioatto lateenbay""* *dammit*"

"What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Their last hit was the wall."

"What disease do basement dweller mosquitos give you? M'laria"

"If a redhead works in a bakery... ...does that make him a gingerbread man?"

"We used to have a dog with no back legs and steel balls We called him Sparky."