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Joke of the Day

"Welcome back to plastic surgery anonymous. Nice to see so many new faces here today."

"What's a bitch's favorite form of advertisement? A paw pup."

"What's the difference between a JCB and a giraffe Ones got hydraulics the other has high-bollocks"

"I call my dick Little Ceasers. It's hot and ready but it tastes like shit."

"I told my friends that I'm going on a date with a gorgeous girl, and they teased me that she's imaginary. Joke's on them, they are too."

"My girlfriend hates it when I sneak up on her And according to the judge, she also hates it when I call her my girlfriend"

"Is it 5 seconds from when it hits the floor or when I see it? I just noticed a skittle under my desk. I don't remember eating skittles."

"Glad the lady in front of me decided at the last second to stop at the yellow light as I prefer to eat my fries from the dashboard."

"Has anyone ever tried Ethiopian food? neither have they"

"I just saw two guys high five. What the hell? I thought we got rid of these people."