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Joke of the Day

"Name your child autocorrect, because eventually they'll just finish your sentences and correct you every chance they get too."

"Nick Kroll and Amy Poehler are moving to France to start a family... They want a house full of French Krollers."

"A bus station is where a bus stops; a train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station."

"I've never sky dived but I have zoomed in real fast on google earth"

"If Royce Da 5'9 gave up his career in rapping.. He'd become Royce Da 9-5. ^^^^Mixed ^^^^up ^^^^the ^^^^numbers ^^^^last ^^^^time."

"I've been driving for 20 years And I still haven't seen any fast children at play"

"How many ""friend zoned"" guys does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw. Edit: a word"

"What is the most common educational degree in New Mexico? Kindergarten dropout."

"Did you know if you drink the fluid from a magic 8 ball you can see the future. Trust me. My friend Keith did it once and he said he was going to die and then he did."

"There are two guys named Ted One is near-Ted, the other is..."