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Joke of the Day

"Why did the feminist cross the road? To kick a sleeping homeless man in the head and steal his money"

"excuse me, waitress? ""I'm not a waitress"" Oh, what are you then ""Well, I'm a..*turns to other burger king employee* what the hell are we?"""

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion ? Because he was out standing in his field :)"

"Seriously guys, every 'yo momma' joke has already been done thousands of times by thousands of people.. just like yo momma!"

"By my calculations, I've spent approximately $39 throughout my life to watch bananas turn brown on my kitchen table"

"I return to work tomorrow with a child-like belief that 2017 is the year people will think at least twice before hitting Reply All."

"How do you cover 12 holes with one hole? Take a flute and shove it up your ass."

"It's kind of funny how so many people think that being gay is a choice but being fat isn't"

"There are two types of people in this world. And I hate them both."

"What do you call a guy with diarrhea who just had his father committed to the insane asylum? A crap happy chappy with a slap happy pappy."