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Joke of the Day

"Why Did The Tiger Cross The Road? Because there wasn't a Zebra crossing Sorry, my 5 year old son made me post this"

"I bet my church never imagined it was even possible to twerk to Amazing Grace."

"Boss: John, tell me your greatest weakness Me: Honesty B: I don't think that's a weakness M: I don't give a shit what you think."

"A pirate walks into a bar... A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, ""Hey, you know you have a steering wheel between you legs right?"" The pirate replies, ""Arrrr, Matey! It drives me nuts!"""

"Donald Trump said that all the Mexicans he meets love him... they are always telling him he is a cool arrow."

"me: [gets on one knee] GF: [gasps] me: [reaches into pocket] GF: OMG me: [pulls phone out] don't move there's a Pokemon on your foot"

"Nothing ruins a Friday more than an understanding that today is Tuesday."

"What did the woman say to the vampire when she woke up with her period? ""I made you breakfast in bed!"""

"When I'm texting, I start typing faster when i see you're typing too. Oh, IT'S ON!! #amazingrace"

"How do you know Jesus is okay with gays? Because he had two dads"