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Joke of the Day

"When I drop my son off at school I do one arm pushups at the entrance to let the other dads know that's what's up. But they're all at work."

"I didn't like my haircut at first... But it's growing on me."

"I want to start my own distillery, but i'm a bit hesitant.... it's a whisky business."

"I hate it when my girlfriend tells me she's about to come I have shitty cellphone reception."

"What do you call an Asshole with golden hair TRUMP !"

"What do you get when you cross 400 Obese Water Buffalo with a Transgender Pimp? Clickbait"

"Why does Tom Cruise like Scientology? It's given him a great cult following"

"I once met a prostitute that said she would do anything for $100 I said paint my house."

"Drunk dude told me this at a party ""Hey Katy, do you know what your Canadian name is?"" ""Katy A."" (Katy, eh) Maybe you would've had to have been there..."

"How are you related to the sun? Because your teeth are the same colour as it."