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Joke of the Day

"What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? RUN! She's got a grenade in her mouth!"

"I know the voices in my head aren't real but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome!"

"How does an Alcoholic teach the ABC's to their children? Backwards."

"What's the difference between a guy with carry on luggage and a photon? The guy overpacked, and the photon is traveling light."

"*pets a duck* helo litle friemd u used to b a dinosuar"

"Q: ""What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?"" A: ""You can't tuna fish."""

"Why was the army recruiter in the nursery? To find more people for the infantry! I'm sorry."

"A man started telling people he was a piece of fruit. Everyone was convinced he was bananas"

"Why are blowjobs referred to as ""giving head""? ... because it's the only way for women to get ahead in life."

"How do you make a space party? -You PLANet"