206762

Joke of the Day

"A woman said to her husband: ""Tie me and I'll let do what you want"" Then, he tied her and slept with the maid"

"So Rene points to Gorgias in the schoolyard and says, ""you're a stupid solipsist..."". ...and Gorgias says, ""I know you are but what I am."""

"Very offensive man on the loose with flint and steel Sparks outrage"

"I'm invincible. I can not be Vinced"

"Why can't you bring an Indian to a fancy restaurant? Because they get the Buddha in the Gouda! ;D"

"If I'm old enough to be your mother we can't date. Just kidding. Go ask for your allowance and buy me a drink."

"That Hamburger Helper hand guy. There's a twin out there, right? Didn't go into showbiz. Maybe an accountant or something."

"Welcome to The News. Tonight's top story: you know that thing you love? It's terrible and you're terrible. Thanks,"

"Why can't a bicycle stand up? It is two tired."

"People used to go all around the world for spices. That must have been underwhelming. ""Guys, I've been gone three years and this is cumin."""