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Joke of the Day
"Why did the stoner take his wife to court? He wanted to get joint custody."
Next Joke
"Q: How did the artist paint a picture? A: Easel-y."
"When I walk through the produce aisle I feel that the fruit is conspiring against me, and that gets on my nerves.... I don't know, maybe I'm just pear-annoyed."
"What do you call it when a Greek handicap falls over? Olympus has fallen."
"I like my coffee like i like my women. Ground up and in the fridge."
"How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon? They'll tell you"
"My neighbors listen to awesome music. Whether they like it or not."
"Remember Doodle-Bob from Spongebob? So do I, guy was Sketchy as hell."
"""And what will you do if you're crowned Miss Universe?"" ""I will have a special prosecutor put the first runner up in jail."""
"Jared Fogle says, ""Spell 'Tuna Sub' backwards and that's what I'll do in your kid's face"""