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Joke of the Day

"Drew Barrymore is so hot. That's why E.T. is one of my favorite movies."

"When you're done reading this joke please don't show it to any virgins. They won't get it for a long time."

"I've been diagnosed with a type of amnesia where I deny the existence of certain 80s bands. there is no cure."

"What was the philosopher's last thought before he descended into quicksand? I sink therefore I am."

"Teacher to child: 'do you know how to spell banana? Child: 'Yes, but I don't know when to stop'."

"People on this plane got so uptight when I used the bathroom to change into my PJs. Llike they've never seen a man in a nightgown before."

"I got peanut butter on my camera Now every picture is a jif"

"What drug is most destructive with phones? Crack."

"I bet all the other glues are really jealous of Super Glue."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Korea's missiles can't reach that far."