81428

Joke of the Day

"I bought a new pair of polarizing sunglasses and was asking my friends what they thought of them. They seemed to either love them or hate them."

"My friend's offering to pay for a trip to NY to be her +1 for a wedding. She's probably going to drug me & sell my organs. *agrees to go :)"

"Why are there no black people in the game Clue? Because then, it would be called Solved."

"This morning I had a 10 o'clock meeting and got there at 9:11. Too soon."

"Hey, remember me from last night? You gave me the wrong number but I found you on Facebook. I'm on your porch. Can I come in?"

"I keep waiting for my Cadbury Creme Eggs to hatch into Cadbury Creme Chickens, but no luck so far. And sitting on them certainly didn't help"

"I wrote a poem. I dig. You dig. She digs. He digs. They dig. We dig. Now I know it's not a very good poem, but it's pretty deep."

"What's another name for a Jew? A sneeze."

"Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make Then they call me ugly and poor."

"Why don't ants go to church? Because they are insects."