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Joke of the Day

"How does an elephant get out of a small car ? The same way that he got in !"

"What's 12 inches long, stiff, red and purple, and makes women scream? Crib death"

"Got up at 6:30am today. Did some yoga. Had a protein shake. Ran six miles. Started lying about everything."

"What's Santa's favourite metal band? Sleigher."

"Why did the interjecting, dismissive, gay Italian have so many problems? Probably because he was such a- ""Fagget about it!"""

"Do you know what they say about the guy that invented life savers? He sure made a mint."

"So Mario is talking to Luigi. ""So I breka up with tha princess last night. But I told her, it's a not you, it's a me! Mario!"""

"Somewhere in the world, there's a real Nigerian Prince who wants to share his millions of dollars but can't find a beneficiary."

"I'm surprised ABC hasn't resolved the Healthcare Crisis with a new reality show. Extreme Makeover: Universal Healthcare Edition."

"Superman: How'd you know? Lex: Know what? S: My secret identity! L: Whaddya mean? S: You called me a KENT!! L: That's NOT what I called you."