79606

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?"

"eer booze and fun!' 'How do barmen surf the web? On the Gin-ternet."

"Twilight drinking game rules: 1) drink 40 shots when you press play so you can die before the movie starts."

"My son: Mommy I can't wait to grow up and be a man. Me: Don't be silly son, you can't do both"

"What happens when a fly drinks rum? It gets buzzed!"

"[commercial] WOMAN: have u ever wondered what would happen if a car alarm could swim? NARRATOR: geese"

"Son: ""Dad, what's the difference between confident and confidential?"" Dad: ""Hmm. You are my son. Of that, I am confident. Your friend Timmy is also my son. That's confidential."""

"Why do fencers love Reddit? Because of all the *ripostes*"

"I like my coffee like I like my women. Without a penis."

"How do you get a witch pregnant? You fuck her."