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Joke of the Day

"Why is paper money more valuable than coins? When you put it in your pocket you double it and when you take it out you find it in creases. -"

"I taught myself to stop using filler words like ""um"" [weather channel in the background] ""Chance of rain today is 40%"" Better grab my brella"

"The worst restaurant in the world is ""wherever you wanna go is fine with me."""

"How many Nazis did it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, despite crimes against humanity they were efficient people and had state of the art engineering."

"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef."

"Women who say the quickest way to a mans heart is through his stomach hasn't seen his browser history."

"Why is it so hard to find Tylenol in the jungle? Because the parrots eat 'em all. . . . Explanation: Parrots eat 'em all = paracetamol = acetominophen = Tylenol"

"[Puzzle Group Therapy] Crossword: Just once, someone use a pen! Sudoku: Nobody likes math. Jigsaw: ..Then they glued me together! *sobs*"

"Life is all about trying way too hard to look like you're not trying."

"I would like to make a masturbation joke But today that would be way to corny"