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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef."
Next Joke
"My favorite Lil Wayne song is the one where he sounds like a constipated muppet trying to list off active ingredients in Children's Tylenol."
"Two old ladies are sitting on a prk bench when a streaker ran past. One had a stroke. The other couldn't reach."
"I love the smell of moth balls, but I find it difficult to spread their tiny little legs."
"I should marry my neighbor. She doesn't live with me, we never speak, and we see each other naked all the time."
"Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account."
"What is the difference between a garbanzo beans and a chickpea? I would never let a garbanzo bean in my mouth."
"As a father of girls, I think the best interview method for potential suitors will be: ""Let me see your phone"""
"Me: Have fun on your date. Son: What if she drinks too much, or gets high? Me: You really aren't my kid are you?"
"How do you make a Whiskey Sour? Crush it's hopes and dreams."