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Joke of the Day

"I turned into a transformer last night... And boy are my arms tires"

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"What's the difference between a lawyer and a vaccuum? With a vaccuum, the dirtbag's on the inside!"
"Just for once I wanna be able to say ""It wasn't my fault"" without 4 people breaking down why it was my fault"
"What are the most common mistakes your ______ makes in bed?"
"Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? Because he only comes once a year. ( )"
"Do you want to hear a joke about steak? Never mind, I'll tell you later. But it's very well done."
"How many tickles... How many tickles before a squid starts to laugh? Ten tickles"
"If two Homeless people are hitting each other with a cardboard boxes... Is it a pillow fight?"
"You know what they say about the necronomicon? It's a real cult classic!"
"If I was named Edward Normus, I'd use my first name's initial and my last name as much as I possibly could."