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Joke of the Day
"This guy came up to me and told me that he fucked my mom My step dad is weird as fuck"
Next Joke
"What's a pirate's favorite letter? Marque"
"What do truck drivers and porn stars have in common? They both get paid by the load."
"What do cows do for fun? They go to the moo-vies!"
"You are the joke ..... Yes seriously!"
"If you look at the number of mosques there are in London.... If you look at the number of mosques there are in London you can only come to one conclusion: Jesus is **** at Monopoly."
"Lost my first follower today. Funeral is Tuesday. Will be live tweeting. It's what he would have wanted."
"Listening to my coworker cry about her gag reflex not being able to swallow her allergy pills.. All I keep thinking is: Her poor boyfriend.."
"When I was 20, a stranger ran up to me in the street and said we should get a divorce. That set the tone of weirdness for my adult life."
"A prickle of porcupines A murder of crows A flamboyance of flamingos A twitter of depressed, alcoholic perverts A shrewdness of apes A parla"