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Joke of the Day
"Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? It heard the referee was blowing fowls"
Next Joke
"When I die, I want to pass peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa Not screaming in petrified terror, like his passengers."
"What do you call a Mexican midget lady? Cuntswaylow"
"I never text and drive bc that would imply that I actually go places."
"What's your favorite preservative salt, vinegar, lemon? Mine's embalming fluid."
"I forgot I had an ambien in my back pocket Now my ass is asleep"
"""Did you realise that a woman's ""I'll be ready in five minutes"" and a man's ""I'll be home in five minutes"" are exactly the same?"""
"My dog has figured out I'm Chinese. He totally tried to make a run for it. Silly dog, I'm not going to eat you until I train a replacement."
"How many pedants does it take to replace a burnt light bulb? Glass doesn't burn."
"How do you greet a three-headed monster? Hi, hi, hi."