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Joke of the Day

"When I die, I want to pass peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa Not screaming in petrified terror, like his passengers."

Next Joke
 
"What is Bruce Wayne's favorite religious health food? Christian Kale"
"Me: ""This Chardonnay is so nice, I can really taste the oaky undertones"" ""Sir those are just chunks of cork from opening it with your keys"""
"Tuesday walks into a bar sits down, hangs his head, and says why me."
"What did the drug dealer say to his long time girlfriend? Marriage-u-wanna?"
"Its funny how guys always say they would give their left nut to do something awesome. Why is the right nut so much cooler than the left nut?"
"Why do black people have nightmares? Because the last guy who had a dream got shot"
"Why are white girls so odd? Because they ""can't even!"""
"What did the farmer say to Lil Jon? Turnip for what"
"They say nobody likes Nickelback... ... but there's **gotta be somebody.**"