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Joke of the Day

"(OC) A little joke I just made up... Homeless people never get inside jokes."

"America, a country where people spend half of their money on food, and the other half on losing weight."

"You know you do too much online shopping when your kids start drawing pictures for the UPS man."

"Two peanuts were walking through Central Park late at night. One was a salted."

"I just put a bunch of lipstick up my butt. (NSFW) I've suddenly realized that makeup sex is highly overrated."

"Pro tip: Before you tell her that you love her, make sure you're not horny, drunk, lonely, desperate, sad, angry, bored or hungry."

"What's Up Doc? by Howie Dewin"

"(boom boom clap) (boom boom clap) Daisy you're a dog you're a good dog Playing in the park Gonna eat some cool bugs today"

"i finally checked out chatroulette. i saw three fornicators, two masturbaters, and a partridge in a pear tree."

"What is the difference between a sharply dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle ? A tire."