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Joke of the Day

"i finally checked out chatroulette. i saw three fornicators, two masturbaters, and a partridge in a pear tree."

"Where does the general keep his armies? Up his sleevies."

"So Kim Kardashian's arse is huge and has a lot of oil I wonder if America will invade it? Oh wait, my bad, half of America already has"

"Star Wars Spoilers You clicked on this? Seriously? What is wrong with you?"

"Do you remember that creepy girl who stood behind you on a train 6 years ago and was smelling your hair? Hi!"

"A lady asked me where my adopted son came from and I said if she doesn't know by now where babies come from it's not my place to tell her"

"If I got a dollar every time a girl said I wasn't her type, I'd be her type."

"befor they had dog cops they tried cat cops but the cats kept meowing at the policemans durimg the stakeouts"

"I am meeting my twitter crush in a few days and I have officially added ""Please let me wind up in a trunk and not a freezer"" In my prayers"

"Haha I made you click GOT YA"