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Joke of the Day

"For the longest time I thought a jetski was what people who say ""brewski"" for ""beer"" call an airplane."

Next Joke
 
"Marry someone shorter than you so you can hide all the good snacks on the top shelf."
"When it comes to physically abusive relationships... They are hit or miss"
"Babies are really expensive, which is why all the ones in Babies R Us don't have price tags."
"A woman asked her husband ""what trait of me do you love the most?'' ''My beautiful face? My sexy body?"" The husband looked at her from top to bottom, and answered, ""I love your humor."""
"*brain waking up* oh god please not again I can't keep existing in this reality *brain 20 minutes later* 1000000 chameleons is a chamillion"
"My favorite porn website changed their header to include a breast cancer awareness ribbon, so you could say I'm somewhat of an activist."
"I am quitting alcohol for a month. Sorry, that came out wrong I am quitting. Alcohol for a month."
"[grocery store] dad to his crying baby: shhh stop crying [baby keeps crying] me: wow, your baby does not listen"
"I made my wife dinner tonight She was great with BBQ sauce"