73662

Joke of the Day

"Last night after we had sex I asked my wife if she was faking it and she said ""no, I really was asleep."""

"Santa joke Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because he only cums once a year, and when he does it's down a chimney."

"What do you call a display of Australian patriotism? Stockholm Syndrome."

"If Sean Connery was in the bathroom and told someone what he was doing, it would sound like he was repeating himself. ""I'm shitting in here, pooping."""

"Q: Why did the bass player get mad at the timpanist? A: He turned a peg and wouldn't tell the bass player which one."

"Why are glasses required to do math? because you need it for davision"

"Did you guys ever hear my joke about Ebola virus? It's a gut buster!"

"Shark Who Attacked Surfer: ""I Was Just Trying To Impress My Girlfriend"""

"*loses beer *opens new beer *finds old beer *drinks 2 beers I win"

"What is yellow and cant swim? An excavator. Why? It only has one arm."