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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Sara Palin's mouth and her vagina? Only one retarded thing came out of her vagina."

"The Pope just reaffirmed that Jews can go to Heaven Damn legacy applicants."

"Listen buddy, I never said they were for sale. I just put the ""FRESH EGGS"" sign in my yard to brag"

"9 called to ask how much bleach it takes to get purple ink out of carpet and because she's so cute and at her dad's I went with all of it!"

"How do you catch a red elephant? With a red elephant trap."

"On this pesticide spray it says, ""Keep away from children."" Fuck, they knew I was coming."

"Why can't I think of a word that means something really good or really bad depending on how you use it in a sentence? Fuck!"

"My grandmother used to wakeup and head for the bathroom . along the wat she would say with a raised voice 'o Jesus christ' Soon after my grandfather passed away she asked me to move the coffee table"

"What's the best part about child molestation jokes? You don't understand it until you're older!"

"What's the difference between a Russian Potato and a U.S. Potato? The U.S. potato can still compete in the Special Olympics."