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Joke of the Day

"Customer: Waiter this soup tastes funny. Waiter: So laugh sir."

"I changed the tranny in my 69 Camaro. Now he has a brand new dress!"

"Why was the hippo afraid to go skiing? He didn't want to get hippothermia."

"Borrowing Money ""Glad to see you, old man. Can you lend me five dollars ?"" ""Sorry, but I haven't a cent with me today"" ""And at home ?"" ""They're all very well, thank you, very well""."

"Did you hear about the NFL player who went to prison? He went in a tight end and came out a wide receiver."

"I killed my twin because she wouldn't admit that she was the evil one."

"Q: Why did the blonde snort Sweet-n-Low? A: She thought it was Diet Coke."

"Great opinion from a stupid girl ! Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things. Boy: What are the two things? Girl: Your feet."

"It sucks not being miserable enough to bust out a good tweet."

"Why did Ted Bundy dropout of an Italian cooking class? There were not enough Italians to eat."