730

Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I'm depressed and then a girl stars one of my tweets and it's like YAAAAYYYY NEW GIRLFRIEND!!!!!"

"What's the downside of being a redneck kid at Christmas? You only get presents from one set of grandparents."

"What's the difference between Bud Light and piss? The vortex bottle"

"What do you get if you cross a telephone and a marriage bureau ? A wedding ring !"

"my love is blind :("

"My neighbours were listening to some pretty cool music until the arseholes asked me to turn it down."

"The two things to remember when ur a pothead 1)U lose short term memory 2) Damn! I know there's something else"

"Boy says this to girl Boy: No word can describe how beautiful you are Girl: Awwwww Boy: But a number can, 2/10"

"Intelligent people are some of the biggest idiots I've ever met."

"How do you know if an introvert likes you? He looks at your shoes instead of his"