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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Bud Light and piss? The vortex bottle"

"A guy walks into a bar owned by Eminem... He says,""Give me 2 shots..."" The bartender cuts him off saying,""You only get one shot."""

"I'm sad can u paypal me 50$ to spend on shoes"

"I accidentally sent a dick pic to everyone in my address book. Not only was I embarrassed it cost me more than $50 in stamps."

"I'm pretty sure God and Satan are both women, because who else would hold a grudge for that long?"

"What do you call a singer who enjoys spicy food? Frank Sriracha"

"I'm beginning to suspect that my boyfriend is not really a ninja & that he moved out nine month ago."

"Why can't you smell Bran (spoilers) He's hodorless"

"What does Wonder Woman call foreplay? Amazon Prime."

"So the woman sitting next to me on a plane with an infant in her lap looks over to me and asks, ""do you mind if I breast feed?"" And I respond, ""no thanks I already ate."" Too harsh of a dad joke?"