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Joke of the Day

"LEONARDO DA VINCI: *on street corner* eeey girl! gimme a smile, girl! nah, not that big. make it cryptic, girl, like 'what is she thinking'"

"What did the tomato say to the ear of corn? Nothing, as tomatoes lack any ability to communicate."

"cats are the best because you can pet one while you're talking to someone and look totally evil"

"What do you get when you give a duck a knife? A murder most fowl."

"*draws a sharpie mustache on my grandma* lol you cant hang loser. passin out w/ shoes on? rookie ""Sir please step away from the casket"""

"Is it just me... or are circles pointless?"

"want to hear a joke about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO"

"A Brazilian got the first gold medal The police are already after him."

"Why did the water turn into steam? It mistbehaved"

"What's brown and sounds like a bell? DUNNNG! What's brown and sounds like a Southern Belle? Blanche Devereaux with a tan."