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Joke of the Day
"Q: What did the writing utensil take for his high sugar level? A: Pencil-in."
Next Joke
"It would probably be cool to hang out with a witch because you could bake just the biggest cake in her child sized oven."
"Why did the /r/jokes subscriber cross the road? To shitpost ""DAE hate Trump and Hillary?"""
"I want to live the kind of life that when St. Peter looks over my list of sins he gives me a high-five before he sends me to hell."
"Why did the Muslim fail his Chemistry Exam ? because to him, alcohol is not a solution."
"What do you call an unsweetened, kosher lemonade? acidic juice"
"Online dating rule: If we meet up offline, and you look nothing like your pictures, then you're buying me drinks until you do."
"At my funeral I want the picture of me next to the coffin to have eyeholes cut out with someone behind it glaring at people coming in."
"My 2 year old has a pretty big attitude considering that I'm the only one who can open the fridge."
"How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but how in the hell did they get in there?"