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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock. Who's there? *Doctor* Doctor who? *Actually, it's just ""the doctor"".*"

"When you're down 'neath the sea, and an eel bites your knee... That's a moray!"

"i tried to ask a girl out today but i messed up my words and accidentally summoned a demon. anyway, whats a good first date for a demon"

"There might be plenty of good food choices in College.. .. but you can't Top Ramen"

"""And if all your friends were jumping off a bridge, would you make up a story about jumping off a bridge too?""-- Teen Brian Williams' mother"

"A priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walks into a bar He orders a beer"

"What does German goalkeeper Manuel Neuer call it when he takes a dump and there is nothing on the toilet paper after wiping? A clean sheet."

"So, I told a girl ""send boobs""... ...and she sent me a topless of her, 8 years old, at a beach. Girls are really losing it, man. Year-old picture?!"

"There's no bigger psychopath than the guy working out at the gym in jeans."

"I've finally taken the time to list my collection of John Lennon memorabilia on eBay. Imagine all the PayPal."