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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell if an elephant's been to your birthday party? Look for his footprints in the ice cream."

"What do you call a group of white people A group you racist"

"I've even started lying about my age on the treadmill at the gym."

"*walks into Babies R Us* Hi I'd like to buy a baby. ""Sir we don't-"" *I slide him a 100 dollar bill* ""This way please."""

"I finally told her those three magical words every woman wish to hear.. I give up!"

"Apparently ""cheesecake & tacos"" wasn't the answer the interviewer was looking for when he asked me what my weaknesses are."

"3-year-old: Where do people go when they die? Me: Heaven. 3: I don't want to go there. Me: Why not? 3: It's full of dead people."

"What does Tickle Me Elmo get before he leaves the factory? Two test-tickles"

"Why did the feminist accuse her teacher of misogyny? Because he'd D graded her."

"My dog just growled back at my rumbling stomach. We have reached a new level of communication."