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Joke of the Day
"A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar. He orders a beer."
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"2 fish. there are 2 fish in a tank, one turns to the other and says, ""How the fuck do you drive this thing?"""
"My preschooler talks a lot of trash when we play Chutes and Ladders for someone who needs help counting his spaces."
"Which weighs more, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of bricks? The tonne of feathers, because not only do you carry the feathers, you have to carry the burden of what you did to those poor birds."
"Cosmetology school was a real letdown. Anyone wanna buy a spacesuit?"
"How do you make a dog stop humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick."
"The janitor's union called for sweeping reforms."
"People got tired of my lactation joke I kept milking it."
"If I was a hot chick. I'd open my legs so wide I'd be able to fit all four of my Ferraris in my snatch."
"What do you call a ghost chicken? A poultry-geist!"