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Joke of the Day

"If life were a videogame, what would be the easiest difficulty setting? Straight White Male"

"What's a pirate's favorite letter? Aye yee think it be arrrrr, but it be the seaa"

"What's the difference between a duck? One of it's legs is both the same."

"Did you hear about the gay magician? He disappeared with a puff."

"[On a date] Date: So what do you do? Me: I'm a taxidermist Date: Oh... wow. Fox: And a ventriloquist"

"I ordered a penis enlarger from eBay last week. The bastard sent me a magnifying glass."

"Heisenberg got pulled over by the cops for speeding Winding down his window, he was greeted by a shout of ""Do you know how fast you were going?!"" ""Not a clue, but I know *exactly* where I was."""

"dishes laundry vacuuming dusting me *Things that won't get done today."

"What do white supremacists send their toddlers to before kindergarten? Pre-KKK"

"To you Star Trek fans: what does the Star Ship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? They both search around Uranus for Klingons"