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Joke of the Day

"To you Star Trek fans: what does the Star Ship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? They both search around Uranus for Klingons"

"Q: Why did it take three burly Boy Scouts to help the old lady across the street? A: Because she didn't want to go."

"What does a sperm cell have in common with a lawyer? Both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being."

"I really hate working late. My ride turns into a pumpkin and I always end up losing a shoe."

"Yesterday I saw a girl driving next to me while texting on her phone... I was so disgusted by her irresponsible driving that I rolled down my window and threw my beer at her."

"Gandhi once got into a food fight... It was naan violence."

"I finally decided I want to be a car mechanic. Guess it just took some motor-vation."

"What did Hillary Clinton say when she got to the restaurant? ""Can I have a private server?"""

"How a phone recall works. Samsung: Send us your exploding phone. Microsoft/Nokia: A software update will fix that. Apple: You are using it wrong."

"What do do you call a Mexican rolling in the sand? A churro."