191899

Joke of the Day

"I ordered a penis enlarger from eBay last week. The bastard sent me a magnifying glass."

"A lot of people look at Russian roulette as a negative game, but statistically it's actually one of the only games you can't lose twice"

"when ever yo mama farts she gets fined by the EPA for polluting."

"Why is ISIS like Little Miss Muffet? They both have Kurds in their way."

"What do you call a clown that gives you flowers? A Romantic Jester!"

"Scots vs English Why do Scotsman wear kilts? Cause sheep can hear a zipper at 50 yards. Why do the English wear trousers? Cause goats are deaf."

"What is the difference between an amateur archer and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit... The other hoots but can't shit."

"Candy corn is the rare candy that's worse than than the vegetable it's based on."

"If you're havin AutoCorrect problems I feel bad for you son. I got 99 parabolas bit s butch Saint omg."

"Why are giraffe's heads so far away from their bodies? Long necks."