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Joke of the Day

"There are two kinds of people who don't say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot."

"I start every argument off with ""first of all..."" like I'm really going to school them, but my second point is always just name calling."

"What does robbing a Scotsman get you? Kilt"

"What goes: 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? A blind guy with a rubix cube"

"What was the most popular TV show in Ancient Rome and Germany in early AD? Whose Rhine Is It Anyway?"

"What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't cry when you cut up a hooker."

"I'll accept the consequences but in my defense, it was a double dare.. Judge: well in that case, I triple dog dare you 60 days in jail."

"If I was a cop, I would write the word 'Influence' on a bridge, and pull over anyone that drives under it."

"A friend asked how I'd describe a hot air balloon, and I just told him it's a lot like my ex, but with a basket."

"What do reindeer have that other animals don't have? Baby reindeer"