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Joke of the Day

"Girlfriend and I are visiting San Fran to finally see the Golden Gate in person. ""What are we going to do when we see it?"" she asks. ""We'll cross that bridge when we get there."""

"The bartender says ""we don't serve particles that disrupt time flow!"" A tachyon particle walks into a bar......."

"What do you get when combine a penis and a potato??? A dictator!"

"The guy at the urinal next to me must really like my wrist watch."

"What did the pig say when it found a fly in its soup? ""Yum Yum."""

"I work out at the same time every day... tomorrow."

"*tip toes out front door* *wife texts me from China* ""Where you going?"""

"Help she is suffering from anal seizures? No she is just twerking."

"What do they eat instead of ""pigs in a blanket"" in McKinney, TX? Pork in a roll. (At least I'm trying)"

"My inflatable girlfriend always looks surprised when I walk into the room."