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Joke of the Day

"I just opened a Capri Sun in the dark, sup ladies"

"what did the locomotive conductor crave once he became a zombie? traaaiins..."

"What do you call a mexican midget? A speck."

"What's the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator? The fridge doesn't fart when you pull the meat out."

"What's mostly red and has 2 legs? Half of a cat."

"Groundhogs Constipation is a bit like watching for groundhogs on Groundhog Day. You know spring is coming early, but that reclusive rodent is nowhere to be seen."

"Dad asks his kids what the third planet from the sun is called? Kids: - Earth! Dad: - Yeah, but it has another name. Kids: - Oh, dad. We don't know! Tell us! Dad: - Exactly! [drops mic]"

"I automatically write off anything Donald Trump says because someone with that much money has no excuse for that hair."

"What do you call a door with no legs? A door."

"Why is it so confusing to play chess with the British? It's only check, mate"