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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Porsche and a trash bag full of dead babies? I don't have a Porsche in my garage."

"Yo momma's so fat... I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing!"

"Why I never get drinks at the bar with my dog... I'm afraid of getting woofied."

"Every couple weeks I pour a little cocoa powder and hot milk down the sink as a pick me up for any struggling mole people."

"What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend? He wipes his butt!"

"""I'll have what she's having."" "" Sir, this is a gynecolo-"" ""Shhhh.. *puts finger over Dr's lips* I said I'll have what she's having."""

"""A computer keyboard has more bacteria than a toilet seat."" I don't doubt it, given the shit my boss sends us in email."

"Whats the difference between a dead dog on the side of the road and a dead lawyer on the side of the road? There are skidmarks before the dog."

"Knew a Muslim kid in college who was notorious for being late to everything. We called him 9/12."

"What do you call a promiscuous fat woman? A sperm whale. --- \**awaits SRS downvote brigade**"