46650

Joke of the Day

"Why is it so confusing to play chess with the British? It's only check, mate"

"Carpenters are only in it for them shelves."

"Why did Jesus lose his Halo? Nobody wanted to play on his team any longer after he had a 0 and 2 kill/death ratio and it took him 3 days to respawn."

"My husband said that he seriously fears for my life every time I go out because I'm the ""kind of person people would want to kill."""

"Two blondes walk into a bar You would think one of them would have seen it."

"Buying Muhammed dolls for charity, all prophets go to kids in need."

"I had a third of a Mars bar the other day... All I wanted to do was rest."

"What did the Buffalo say to his son that was leaving for College? Bison"

"What do you get when you cross a leopard and a camel? A fireside rug you can get a good hump on. Source: Jo Brand on QI S3; Cat's Eyes"

"I really want to meet this Hardon Collider. Is he a new pornstar?"