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Joke of the Day

"alladin: do u trust me jasmine: i've only known you for 2 hours a: so u don't wanna jump off this rooftop j: lemme ask my tiger first"

"Me: ""Can I have a few extra days off before Christmas?"" Boss: ""It's May."" Me: ""Sorry, may I have a few days off before Christmas?"""

"Thanks for telling me this is your ""pet cat"" because otherwise I might have thought it was your business associate cat."

"What powerful reptile is found in the Sydney opera house ? The Lizard of Oz !"

"Wanna hear a good dick joke? ...hold on, it's coming."

"Writing a romcom about a human centipede front that falls in love with a human centipede back. Middle guy is the comic relief ""cockblocker"""

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a 6 offender."

"What do you call a bartender giving two dolphins a drink? Serving dual porpoises!"

"Best advice for men about women Never try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other."

"I went to see a theatrical piece about puns last night it was a play on words"